Friday, September 12, 2008

Bain of My Exsistence..Warning to Other Moms






Ok, the first one to guess what this is wins a prize. Any guesses? Going once, twice....

That, my friends, is the very bain of my exsistence!
What, you might ask, could be so wrong with a horse, a purple miniture hairbrush, a pink thing and who knows what that is....?
Oh, how much you have to learn about little girls. You see, those are not just ordinary toys. That is not just an innocent little horse. Please don't let him fool you. Those, dear friends, are the miniture toys that come in McDonald Happy Meals, Polly Pockets, Puppy in my Pocket and every other cheap idea that is fabricated somewhere in China. All of which resides at my residence. Uninvited I might add. Try as I might they just keep reappearing.
Every other month or so I step on one and it becomes that oh-so-unfortunate straw that breaks mommy's back. I then commence the total cleansing of evil from house. No small toy is safe.
Please take a look at this picture. Study is very closely. Memorize it. When she comes knocking on your door, please don't let her in. She looks cute, I know, but she is EVIL! Her only intentions are to wreck havoc of your house and life. Whatever you do, do not let your daughter see her in Walmart or Target. She speaks to your children from the shelves in her little cardboard home. And then, something happens. You, the mom, the one in charge, turns to mush and says "sure honey. it's only $5." What a sucker!


Don't let this little home-wrecker fool you either. She comes with more cheaply made clothes and 1/8" accessories than one could possibly imagine. We have a closet full of these things that never get played with. What did I ever do to Matel? I just don't understand!


To the makers of Polly and Puppies and Barbies----Please, Please Go Away!!!!

6 comments:

Amy said...

Ha! I believe it! Too many junk toys, too many pieces! Oh, and you failed to mention Ella's new jewelry kit! Thousands and thousands and thousands of beads!

Ms. Sarah Sullivan said...

you're too funny! thank goodness my girls aren't in to those...yet.

~~Kerri~~ said...

Kate you are so right. Why do we continue to buy them. I get in my rageing moods as well about every other month and out they go.... and yet they continue to appear...
Amazing little cheaply made creatures!

Christi said...

Boys have them, too. Ours seem to always be equipped with little plastic swords, or some such weapon, that creates wounds unimaginable on my feet. I promise, someday, we'll miss the little things being all over the house.

~lillie~ said...

you are hilarious! and christi is so right! boys have them too and they are just as evil....

Laura Dawson said...

i have learned how to conquer the evil ones in my house after about to 100th time of picking them up (and yes the little Ninja turtle swords and missles are my worst enemies)....the garbage!! Laura